Fat and useless
I feel fat, uselessly fat. We went shopping for the wedding tea dresses and realise that i have to wear an XL now. And Best Friend who is also wearing the same size seems to better fit into the dresses. I haven't lose a single pound. I probably weight more than her. I have to be aneroxic!! I have to stop eating. So i devised a new esting plan again and only to foil it this late morning but hey i am entitled to some leeways right? No. the more leeways the longer the fat is going to stay. I told them all that i am going to lose weight for the wedding. They all gave me the patronised looks! I am going to prove them all WRONG!!
Well anyway I have to prove them wrong and myself that i am really a SUPERIOR being hahaha. Perhaps next week i shall up my outwork intensity and down my eating capability! I have been quite a good girl for a week then when i find out yesterday that i am still freaking fat, I binged.
Nevermind, think that i should perhaps pick up weight training again. Sound like a good thought except for the fear that i might grow incredibly big!
I think he is leaving the fitness scene to have a real job liao. At least that seems like it. Reminded me that i need to get a job too. God.
Well anyway I have to prove them wrong and myself that i am really a SUPERIOR being hahaha. Perhaps next week i shall up my outwork intensity and down my eating capability! I have been quite a good girl for a week then when i find out yesterday that i am still freaking fat, I binged.
Nevermind, think that i should perhaps pick up weight training again. Sound like a good thought except for the fear that i might grow incredibly big!
I think he is leaving the fitness scene to have a real job liao. At least that seems like it. Reminded me that i need to get a job too. God.
1 Comments:
anorexia? bad idea. i'm fat too. :( and it doesn't help that my boyfriend called me fat >:C but i'm beginning to realize that it doesn't fucking matter what other people say, i am who i am and atleast i'm healthy. and i'm losing weight. i used to try to starve myself, but fuck thats useless. do it the healthy way, you'll feel so much better about yourself, and it'll be more rewarding in the end. trust me. <3 best of luck, sweetheart.
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